I NEED YOUR HELP

Dear Friend,

Let me start by introducing myself.I am Mr. SONG LI LE director of operations of the Hang Seng BankLtd.I will need you to assist me in executing this Business Project from Hong Kong to your country.Nineteen millions Five Hundred Thousand United State Dollars only in my branch. Once the funds have been transferred to your nominated bank account we shall then share in the ratio of 70% for me,30% for you.My private email:
(mrsonglilee04@yahoo.com.hk).

Regards,
Song Lile.

Funny Hippo Song

Here's a charming animation for the season:

What Did Your Mother Tell You Abut Feeding Crocodiles?

Wild animals are by nature wild. Putting them in enclosed cages doesnt make them any nicer. Anyway, I feel sorry for the vet who went into the cage to assist the sick crocodile.

Joke: How to Marry a Rich Man?

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.

You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York .
My requirementis not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?

Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden, $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don?t have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (My target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty


Here's a reply from a Wall Street Financial guy:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyze your situation as a professional investor.

My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of beauty and money: Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a trading position. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term, same goes with the marriage that you wanted.

It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be
sold or leased.
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget
looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in leasing services, do contact me.

Signed,

J.P. Morgan

The 9 Clock

Here's a clock made up of the digits 9 only.


Having 9's does not make it special....
You can design a clock having only 9 with 9/9 (=1), (9+9)/9(=2), (9+9+9)/9(=3) and so on...

But what makes it really amazing is the fact that it has only three 9's in each digit representation. ..

Taxi-Schumacher, A Fab World and Marion-Drugs

What if you're late for a flight and the taxi driver is taking his own sweet time in driving to the airport? Not all of us can drive fast. But if you're Michael Schumacher, then that's no excuse. Schumi took the wheel of the taxi he was in and zipped to the airport. And the taxi driver was the passenger :)

Read about it here: Taxi-Schumacher

Then we now come to the high tech world of microprocessor fabrication. It's a very expensive business, in a very clean building where people dress up like Playboy bunnies. Ok, maybe not Playboy bunnies, but the suits their in are called Bunny suits. Read about the fascinating high tech world of microprocessing technology.

And lastly, poor Marion Jones. While I don't know whether she knew she was being given performance enhancing drugs, its sad to read about her fall - her medals stripped, all records of her accomplishment erased. How many young athletes like her have been down the same road - you work hard all your life and just month before the big games, you're been told to take some medicine to help you cope with the stress. In that moment, all you have worked for goes down the drain because you will living in fear of being found out.

Joke: The Brothel...

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. "May I help you?" she asked. "I want to see Valerie," the man replied.

"Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else," said the madam. "No. I must see Valerie," was the man's reply.

Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit.

Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Valerie, and
they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that none had ever come back two nights in a row--too expensive--and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000.

Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.

After their session, Valerie questioned the man.
"No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?" she asked.
The man replied, "South Carolina."
"Really" she said.
"I have family in South Carolina."
"I know," the man said. "Your father died and I am your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance."


The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer

Why Google Is the Future & Why Microsoft is Worried?

Here's a picture of the future.

Everyone will have access to the Internet, anywhere, anytime. With such access, all our documents are created using Google Documents and not Microsoft Office. After all, this is what I am doing now on my own projects. All documents are stored on Google's server and I work on them when I'm at home and at work.

Of course, Microsoft will preach the piracy issue and how insecure Google's servers are. But this doesnt cover the fact that Windows is full of bugs and holes and hackers are able to extract information from your machines as they like. So, what's the difference? The only perception here is that you feel you're safe. Nothing else.

Microsoft ignored the Internet when the Net was born, and it has been racing to catch up ever since. Especially now when computers are becoming cheaper and cheaper. They just cant afford to see everyone using Google.

What Makes a World Class Engineer?

John Swanson.

Acknowledge by many as a fine engineer, he started ANSYS, now one of the world finest finite element software company, in 1970, hust 4 years after graduating from school. He has then gone on to have a distiguished career and life.

Read the whole story here, it explains how one man's desire to push the limit has helped made engineering a whole lot better.

John Swanson

Read This: How To Get Some Passive, Side Income, Monthly From Your Website

If you ever wondered how to get some passive income from your website, then check out this website : Secrets of Google AdSense Millionaires.

It's a website which shows you how you can use Google AdSense to make a decent monthly income from Google if you have a web site.

Let me know if this works for you as it did for me. I may not be a millionaire yet, but a hundred dollars from Google last month isnt bad :)

Secrets of Google AdSense Millionaires .

Joke: A Different Nighttime Prayer

We've been letting our six-year-old go to sleep listening to the radio, and I'm beginning to wonder if it's a good idea.

Last night he said his prayers and wound up with:

"And God bless Mommy and Daddy and Sister. Amen-and FM!"

Quote : Mark Twain

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

-Mark Twain