Monday, May 30, 2011

Dont Mess Around with Tree Roots

Today I learned not to mess around with tress roots. Because when they get mad, they slide into your pipes via the pipe joints and either break your pipe when they get bigger or simply clogged up your sewage system. And when this happens, whatever you flush down the toilet comes gurgling back to you. Trust me on this.

The plumber had spent half a day trying to get to the root of the problem. Tiles were removed, sand was dug out and pipes were cut through and the little machine you see in the picture was put to work. What it does is that it sends in a rotating spring, with a cutter right at the front. The machine rotates the spring one way, then the other. A rotating spring carries a lot of momentum. Put a sharp blade or cutting tool in the front of it and it can and will cut through most material that clog up your pipes.

Today was a good lesson in engineering.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

How to Get Important Things Done.

"How can I get 7-8 hours of sleep when I'm with my kids from the moment I arrive home, and I need some time for myself before bed?"

"How can I find time to exercise when I have to get up early in the morning and I'm exhausted by the time I get home in the evening?"

"How can I possibly keep up when I get 200 emails a day?"

"When is there time to think reflectively and strategically?"

If you constantly ask yourself these questions, like how I usually do, then chew on this, The Only Way to Get Important Things Done.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

How to Open Two Instances of Microsoft Excel 2010

If you're working with Office 2010, you'll quickly find out that you can open two Microsoft Word documents and compare them side by side.

But with Microsoft Excel, it's different. This is because Excel uses a single window method of arranging multiple documents.

The simple way I found to have two Excel documents open to compare is to go and click Start - Program Files - Microsoft Office - Excel to start up another instance of Excel. And then use the File - Open to open the Excel file that you wanted to compare side by side with.

Two software with two different behaviours. Enjoy.

How to Remove All the Stupid People in the World

I'm not saying we should kill all the stupid people in the world,  I'm just saying we should remove the warning labels from everything and let the problem take care of itself.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Newly Weds

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.'

'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife.

'I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I' m going to have a beer.'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?'

She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan , India ,etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, lolly pop...but at the know...they have frozen glasses...'

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?'

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'

You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

'But my sweet honey... At the bar... You know...there's swearing, dirty words and all that...'

'You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your f***ing beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherf***ing snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren't f***ing going anywhere! Got it, Asshole?'

........and, they lived happily ever after.

Now, isn't that a sweet story?

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Mr. Holland Opus

Last night my wife and I caught an old classic, Mr. Holland Opus on Foxtel HD. Although it was supposed to be shown in HD, I dont think it was. I wanted my wife to watch it since she never had. And we stayed up from midnight to 3.30 in the morning enjoying this beautiful film.

If you havent seen this picture, you should. Mr. Holland Opus was released in 1995. But yet its still one of the better films you'll ever watch. It's around 180 minutes viewing time but its a lovely show.

The story is a video biography of a music teacher for 30 years. What begun as career so that he can have some free time to compose music in the evening became a full time career. Ask any teacher and they will concur. A teacher is on duty 24/7. And thus, his dream of composing music was put on a back burner for 30 years when the school he was teaching in finally decided to can the music department because of budget cuts.

After 30 years of blood, sweat and tears, Mr. Holland Opus reluctantly retires. And while he mulls on his lost dream, he is gently reminded by his students that his dream lives on in everyone one of them. Watch the video below. This is the final scene in the movie when Mr. Holland Opus leaves the school for the last time.

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Sacred Heart Church

This is the Sacred Heart Church in Highgate, Perth.

It's a magnificently old church located right in the heart of the city. Just look at the wooden ceiling - simply a magnificent piece of building.

I think the church has an Italian influence as many of the parishioners are Italians. This church is unique in the sense that it has a Blessed Sacrament room that is open 24/7.

Monday, May 02, 2011

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Body Language

A woman gets on a city bus.

She looks at the driver and holds up one hand; the driver holds up two hands.

Next, the woman points up; the driver points down.

Then, the woman grabs her breast; the driver grabs his crotch.

Finally, the woman grabs her butt and gets off the bus.

A curious passenger asked the bus driver what the odd motions were all about.  The driver explained, "The woman is a deaf-mute. She asked me
if a bus ride is five cents, and I told her it was ten cents. Next, she asked if the bus was going uptown, and I told her it was going downtown.

Then, she asked if the bus was going past the dairy, and I told her it was going past the ballpark..."

The passenger interjected, "Okay, but why did she grab her butt as she left the bus?"

The driver continued, She replied "Oh shit, I'm on the wrong bus!"